Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Take care of you... (an update)

A while back I posted a life update, which you can find here.

It has been 4 weeks since my mother was released from the hospital.  FOUR weeks.  I was so happy when she got home because it felt like for the first time in my life I had my mother back, she was nice and pleasant to talk to, she made sense, and most importantly she wasn't drunk.  She had made plans to come with my grandfather to come see me and my son and we were looking forward to seeing her since she last saw him when he is a month old and now he is just over a year old.

Well, two weeks ago she started drinking again.  She swore to me she wouldn't start again because she wanted to live and not ever end up in the hospital again.  I called her out on it because she was starting to do weird things and not make sense again.  She got mad and swore she wasn't drinking and that things were going just fine and she was making lunch and dinner for my grandfather every day.  Well, things got worse and she was squirreled away in her room every day and wouldn't come down at all when my grandfather was home.

I created a calendar for my Grandfather on Shutterfly filled with pictures of my son for his birthday because he's going to be 90 and I had no idea what else to get the man who has everything.  My grandmother died 5 years ago so I try and look for things to cheer him up.  (He loved the calendar, not that he is using it as calendar, but he's 90, he can do whatever he wants).  Well my mother found the envelope and left me a nasty voicemail about how I never send her anything (not true) and how he's hiding the calendar from her (also not true).  He has it on his nightstand because he's using it as a photo book (clearly I ordered the wrong gift).

As of now, my mother is denying that she is drunk.  She is refusing to see any family and keeps in her room squirreled away.  She is mad at all of us and in her world she isn't drinking and is downstairs with my grandfather every day.  She is mad at me because she said she wasn't going to come with my grandfather to visit us and then got mad at me because I said she wasn't allowed until she straightened up and got sober and until then she can't be in our lives.

The main point of this post is, sometimes you have to cut toxic people out of your lives.  Family, friends, acquaintances... if they are toxic you can removed them from your life.  DO NOT FEEL BAD FOR DOING THIS.  YOUR happiness comes first.  I know a lot of people don't understand how I can cut my mother out of my life because "she's your mother."  NO.  My mother has never been my mother, she gave birth to me.  In those brief two weeks after he release she actually felt like a mother, but that quickly came to an end.  I spent years being told I wasn't good enough by her and being kicked to the streets when I was just a teenager by her.  I spent years as a child being beaten by her.  NO ONE DESERVES TO BE TREATED LIKE THIS, NO ONE.

One of my friends shared this graphic with me and I'm going to share it with my followers because it is the TRUTH.


No comments:

Post a Comment

Leave us some comments!